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15 Things You Should Know About Surrogacy

by Neelam Chhagani

Top 15 things you should know about surrogacy.

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Surrogacy is a procedure in which a surrogate carries the child up to its term for the intended parents. But surrogacy is not an easy concept to understand. Various websites give various information to the intended parents thus creating an information overload. This might result in intended parents overlooking some of the important facts about surrogacy. So, here is the compilation of all the Things You Should Know About Surrogacy before opting for the procedure of surrogacy –

#1 There are two types of surrogacy 

There are basically two types of surrogacy arrangements – gestational surrogacy and traditional surrogacy.

In gestational surrogacy, the egg from the intended mother or from the egg donor and sperm from the intended father or sperm donor and fused together to allow fertilization. This embryo is then planted in the gestational carrier’s uterus. From then onwards, she carries the baby up to its term.

In traditional surrogacy, the egg used belongs to the surrogate only, hence surrogacy baby is genetically related to the surrogate. The sperm used can be of the intended father or the sperm donor.

In gestational surrogacy, the surrogate does not have a biological relationship with the child, but in the case of traditional surrogacy, she is the biological mother of the child.

# 2 There will be the presence of legal contracts

Surrogacy is not an easy procedure to do. It requires a lot of legal work to be put in place before proceeding with the process.

The intended parents and the surrogate shall sign a legally binding document – known as a surrogacy agreement -showing the child’s claim.

A surrogacy contract or agreement is also signed on the well-being of the surrogate and the child to state that under her own consent she is carrying the baby. Operating independently of an attorney may trigger a variety of legal issues, both before and after the birth of the infant.

The contract may not provide adequate protection for the intended parents or surrogates, depending on your state and the scope of your legal agreement, and may even result in delayed parenting.

#3 Surrogacy is not legal everywhere

Since surrogacy involves a lot of legalities, it is not applicable everywhere. Even it is not allowed in all 50 states of the USA and surrogacy laws of each state are different.

While the U.S. is, statistically, one of the world’s most surrogacy-friendly countries, there is no federal law providing for standardized control. Each state has to create its own laws on surrogacy, and some are more friendly than others to the process. For example, states like California and Illinois have adopted a legal, supervised system for gestational surrogacy, while the practice is strictly banned by New York and Michigan.

In other countries as well as India, homosexual and single parents cannot opt for the process of surrogacy.

#4 Working with surrogacy agencies can be beneficial

Working with a surrogacy agency can actually help you to save time and money. While it may sound costly in the beginning, it will compensate for all the things you require during the process of surrogacy including emotional support and education.

Although working independently with a surrogate can initially seem more straightforward and cost-effective, it is important to understand the role that an agency plays in overcoming potential roadblocks.

You can only benefit from surrogacy agencies’ knowledge and preparation; their expertise can help you avoid complications such as failed medical testing, legal issues, and issues of feasibility that could otherwise hinder your surrogacy journey. If you research and plan carefully, you can save a lot of surrogacy costs even with the agency.  Read more about international surrogacy countries that offer surrogacy for less than 50% and offer an all-inclusive guaranteed baby plan.

#5 Surrogate mothers typically have a baby of their own before

While it is desirable that a surrogate should have a baby before, it is also the legal requirement for a mother to become a surrogate. One of the main criteria for women who apply to be surrogates, gestational or conventional, is that they used to have a child. The mother must also be at least 21 years.

Endometriosis and Pregnancy are related

#6 Surrogacy is not just for the wealthy and famous couples

The cost of surrogacy depends on different factors, such as the location of the surrogacy process, where is your surrogate located, whether you are using an egg donor or a sperm donor, and whether you are opting for conventional surrogacy or gestational surrogacy?

All of these factors will contribute to surrogacy costs. But nowadays, to expand their families, most would-be parents are opting for surrogate mothers. These individuals belong to the same group as you and me. Thus, anyone with ample financial resources can opt for the surrogacy cycle.

#7 A surrogate mother is not there just for money

The payment for most surrogates comes at the end of the list. Being a surrogate is not at all easy. In order to be a surrogate, she must meet the stringent skills. She’s got to adjust physically, medically, emotionally and family-wise as well.

In both her body and lifestyle, she has to make adjustments. In addition, it imposes strict requirements on a surrogate mother’s lifestyle, hobbies, and daily routine.

She is responsible for the well-being of the child of other couples. The pregnancy itself takes nine months of her time, incorporating the entire legal and medical process into an operation that lasts for more than a year. And, for the cash is just a small portion of surrogacy, the surrogates are not just there.

#8 Surrogate does not want to keep your child

This is the most common fear among the parents expected as if what happens when the surrogate changes their mind. Although these incidents are rare, they can occur.

Ideally, she should have her own kid so she knows how she feels about having her own child. She understands the meaning of family and wishes you the same thing.

Some of them may be thankful for pregnancies that are relatively simple, so they do a great job to help the other family grow. She knows that the kid doesn’t belong to her and that she carries the baby just to hand it over for a while to the expected parents.

#9 You will not have a problem bonding with the baby 

Some intended parents feel they may or may not be able to bond with the child. However, the case is entirely different. You will bond with the baby while the kid is in utero.

You can also attend all medical appointments with the surrogate. Take pictures of ultrasound or capture the voices. Even if you’re not doing these things, it doesn’t mean that you can’t connect with your child.

Mostly, the intended parents will be there when the baby is born. That first experience of skin-to-skin contact is incredible when you have a son. Often, the bonding process starts after the child’s birth, not in the uterus. Once the baby is born, he/she is immediately handed over to the intended parents.

#10 A surrogate can be a family or complete stranger

When it comes to who will carry the baby, there are plenty of options— for some, it’s a family affair, and for others, it’s strictly business.

A surrogate mother may be a close family friend or relative, but with a carefully screened non-related individual, often the most successful arrangements are carried out.

There are agencies specializing in finding intended parents ‘ gestational carriers. If you are going through the process with an agency, the typical timeline can be between 16 and 23 months from starting your search to having a baby.

#11 Women need not be young for the process of surrogacy

Some surrogacy companies offer less than 40 years of age more priority, but some may have more stringent requirements. It can also depend on the parents ‘ choice.

Most of the time, a surrogate’s health and her previous pregnancies ‘ success are also decisive factors. When selecting a surrogate mother, a woman’s mental and emotional health is also considered. Aging can sometimes be a factor, but not one of the key factors doctors or organizations look into.

Father with a baby born via traditional surrogacy

#12 A surrogate can be a surrogate more than once

A surrogate is the one who carries the child for the intended parents. Just like you can be pregnant more than once, similarly, you can be a surrogate more than once.

Many people also continue their surrogacy with the same parents, but many women don’t do it more than once or twice because surrogacy isn’t the easiest thing to do. A woman will typically become a surrogate four times in her life.

#13 Screening and evaluation are required for the surrogate

You will have to work with the surrogacy professional and pass their screening tests once you’ve decided to be a surrogate mother.

Specifically, these screening tests assess that you are physically and psychologically fit for carrying the baby and preventing harm to the mother and the baby’s health. Read more about surrogate health requirements.

#14 Surrogacy will cost you

It takes a lot of time and research to ensure that the surrogate and the parents(s) are a match. For the planned parents and the gestational carrier, there is a comprehensive screening process to ensure compatibility for all involved parties.

This may include a psychosocial evaluation and screening for infectious disease, all of which come at a cost. How much depends on a number of variables.

For example, if you choose to use an egg donor, the price tag would add an extra $15,000 to $20,000. This varies from situation to situation, but if you include medical care costs, an agency charge, surrogate compensation, psychological support, egg donation, and surrogate benefits, you’re looking at more than $110,000.

Learn more about

All-inclusive guaranteed surrogacy baby for hetero couples

All-inclusive guaranteed surrogacy baby for gay couples

#15 You should be able to face the judgment

Surrogacy is still a term that has been overlooked. It’s something that most people don’t understand, so they don’t help it. Most people think it’s an unfair phase and if they can’t get pregnant, couples should just follow it.

Some think it’s selfish and emotionless to give up the idea of carrying someone else’s baby after nine months. The couple and the surrogate must be prepared for negative reviews as many people will always have negative opinions on the matter. But people who suffer from infertility or are following the path of surrogacy can understand and empathize with your surrogacy journey.

Conclusion

Therefore, it is important to look into the matter carefully to know the Things You Should Know About Surrogacy before arriving at any decision about your surrogacy process.

If you’d like to learn more about IVF, Egg Donation, or surrogacy services globally, check out the rest of our website at  IVF Conceptions

I am Neelam Chhagani, a chief Surrogacy Consultant, representing IVF Conceptions, with more than 10 years of experience in international surrogacy.  It will be my great pleasure to assist you. With vast experience and deep subject knowledge, I guide and support intended parents, understanding the surrogacy process in terms of process, costs, and legalities country-wise and then manage their journey with one of our programs/partners worldwide. So, basically, saving their ton of research time and money and thus, channelizing you toward the right direction. 

Neelam Chhagani, MA (Counselling Psychology), PGD (Mental Health), and Holistic Infertility and Third-Party Reproduction Consultant. Member of European Fertility Society, Best Surrogacy Blogger of 2020, with 200 dedicated blogs and top contributor on Quora for Surrogacy. Highly esteemed, authoritative, and trusted professional with a 13-year experience in international surrogacy. Advocate for Secure, Legal, and Affordable International Surrogacy. Learn more: https://www.ivfconceptions.com/neelam-chhagani-surrogacy-consultant/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/neelam-chhagani-92892229/ https://www.quora.com/profile/Neelam-Chhagani

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