How to Find Surrogate Mother Who Is Perfect For You

Finding the ideal surrogate mother for your family-building process is a significant step on your path to parenthood. With so many options available, it’s important to explore various avenues to ensure you find the perfect match. In this article, we will delve into five different paths you can take to find a surrogate mother who aligns with your personal needs and goals.  How to find surrogate mother? Whether you choose to work with a surrogacy agency, a surrogacy clinic, a surrogacy attorney, or explore your network of family and friends, each option has its own unique advantages and considerations.

Gestational surrogacy is bliss for childless couples or for single male or gay couples who wish to have a genetic baby of their own.  Sometimes using a surrogate is the only way of becoming parent or growing families. However, surrogacy is a complex procedure.

“Surrogate Mother” or gestational carrier is an integral part of the full surrogacy process. She carries the baby for nine months and gives birth, but her influence is much more than that. Hence, the surrogate is of utmost importance.

Some couples may find free surrogate mothers on their own. They might know a surrogate before but need to pay attention to the surrogate mother’s requirements. She might be a family member, a close friend, or anyone whom the intended parents know.

However, as intended parents, you might be overwhelmed with the idea of finding the surrogate mother yourself.

There are surrogacy agencies that also provide intended parents with a suitable surrogate but with an added financial cost. They not only find a surrogate but will also help you with other procedures.

More guides for how to find surrogate mother:

10 Desirable ( But Not Mandatory) Qualities Of Surrogate Mothers

Top 12 Surrogate Mother Requirements That Parents Should Know.

How much is Surrogate Mother Payment?

What Is Right Surrogate Mother Age?

How Much Does Surrogate Mother Compensated?

How to find surrogate mother? 

To find surrogate mother, follow the below steps:

1. Research at least 3 surrogacy agencies to have a surrogate mother or find yourself via online help or from a family member or friend.
2. Know the surrogate selection process and follow it rigorously
3. The surrogate screening process and getting familiar with her
4. If all goes well medical screening, psychological evaluation, and background checks start the next step of legal documents.
5. A surrogacy agreement is negotiated and a final draft is formatted for both surrogate and parents with the help of an experienced reproductive attorney
6. Start the medical procedure of endometrium lining preparation  as per the IVF clinic protocol

#1 Finding a surrogate mother through the agency

As first-time intended parents, you might not be able to find a surrogate mother on your own. Here comes the role of the surrogacy agency or surrogacy consultant who will make you meet the surrogate mothers who are screened and approved of being a surrogate. Surrogacy agencies pay close attention to the desirable qualities of the surrogate mother before matching the surrogate mother to the intended parents.

A surrogate specialist will work with you throughout the whole process. The surrogate specialist will belong to the agency itself or might work independently.

Building the plan for hiring the surrogate mother process

At this stage, you will plan what are your goals, aspiration, and expectation from the surrogate. Your agency will provide you with the surrogate of your preference. A few points are kept in mind while assigning a surrogate –

• Experience of the surrogate mother
• Your preference and your involvement with the surrogate
• Your budget you want to spend on surrogacy

Before finding your surrogate, intended parents also need to go through the screening process conducted by the surrogacy agency. This will include in the home assessment as well.

Also, intended parents will be required to make and fill out an intended parent profile. This will explain who the intended parents are and what are their preferences. This will be used to match the surrogate mother to the intended parents as per their preference.

Process of finding the surrogate mothers

After you have filled out your intended parent’s form, you will be presented with the surrogates of your preferences and you will get to know them better. Once you have finalized the surrogate, the next procedure begins. You and the surrogate will be required to sign a legal surrogacy contract.

The time between going to the agency and getting your surrogate is known as Wait Time. There are a few things you can do to lessen your wait times –

• Be open-minded – You must be open-minded about viewing the profiles of different surrogates.
• Flexible – Be as flexible as possible while planning and with your budget so you should have a pool of surrogates to choose from. Surrogate mother pay can vary as per State in the USA.
• Well-intended parent profile – You need to make a true and honest intended parent profile to make a good first impression in front of the surrogates.

 Pros of finding a surrogate with a surrogacy agency

Surrogacy agents are aware of and experienced the overall surrogacy process. They are the experts in surrogacy matching and planning. Intended parents who choose to find a surrogate with the help of an agency receive many benefits. Some of them are –

• Advanced database – Most of the agencies maintain an advanced database that will help the intended parents to find the surrogates of their involvement, goals, and preferences as soon as possible.
• Advanced screening of surrogate mothers – The agency opts for continuous screening to protect everyone in the case involved.
• A lot more benefits – There are many more benefits than just finding a surrogate, for example, explaining the surrogacy and intended parents the surrogacy process. They provide emotional support and are available to guide and support during a full surrogacy journey.

Cons of finding a surrogate with a surrogacy agency

• High surrogacy cost – The cost of surrogacy is already an expensive enterprise for many hopeful parents. But taking the help of a surrogacy agency to find a surrogate mother can add more cost to your process. Sometimes agencies charge some tens to thousands of dollars for providing the services.
• Hands-on Process – The surrogacy agency screens planned surrogates and intercedes contact between potential matches, conceivably making the procedure less “active” than it is in autonomous surrogacy
• Not all agencies are equal – Not all surrogacy agencies are the same or operate at the same level. So, always keep in mind the factors while opting for a surrogacy agency.

#2. Finding a surrogate without a surrogacy agency

How to find a surrogate mother without an agency? Many intended parents want to work with the identified surrogates. These surrogates can be family members or close friends. Or else, they can find a surrogate mother with the help of an online surrogacy support group on Facebook and forums.

Surrogacy plan for free surrogate mothers

In this case, you will not have the privilege of someone else doing your work. You must follow a few steps –

• Find a surrogate and negotiate surrogate mother to pay
• Screen the surrogate for a good match
• Find an attorney to complete the work
• Coordinate with the IVF clinic to perform medical operations
• Find support and counseling

Pros of finding a surrogate without a surrogacy agency/surrogacy clinics 

• Surrogate mother costs – In some of cases, the overall cost of surrogacy might get reduced because the fees of the agency will be eliminated.
• Personal touch – Finding a surrogate on your own will give a personal touch to the process. You will not face a professional as an intermediary between the two.

Cons of finding a surrogate without a surrogacy agency

• No effectiveness – The individual advertising agencies may not prove effective in providing the surrogate mother.
• Susceptibility to fraud – Since there is no screening done in the case of an independent surrogacy procedure, intended parents are susceptible to fraud. If you met someone via an online channel, it is good to know and meet in person before any commitment.
• Need to give more time and attention – Without counseling and educational support, you might not be able to cope with the emotional difficulties during surrogacy.
• Privacy – Keeping your information private will not be possible when looking for surrogates on your own

#3. Finding free surrogate mothers online

Finding a surrogate mother without an agency is not an easy job.  Here the intended parents can find the match by various methods. Methods to find a free surrogate mother via online search–

• Social Networks- Facebook groups and support groups- online support groups for surrogacy
• Personal Networks- Through word of mouth
• Surrogate finder websites- Online website which connects intended parents and surrogate mothers
• Advertisements

More resources on how to find surrogate mother:

How Does Surrogacy Process Work- 7 Easy to Follow Surrogacy Steps

How Much Does Surrogacy Cost? Everything You Need To Know (in 2023)

How much does surrogacy cost with a family member?

Countries for low-cost surrogate mothers

Top 4 cheapest countries for surrogacy in the world

Conclusion

Finding a surrogate mother is the first step toward building a family via the surrogacy process.  By far, you need to give more time and effort to make sure you have the right candidate as the surrogate mother.

To be honest, there is no specific way to know how to find a surrogate mother.  It depends on your personal preferences and priorities.  What works for one wishful parent might not work for others.

However, after analyzing the pros and cons, it is easy to find a surrogate mother with the help of an agency. It will save a ton of research time and you can find a suitable candidate quickly.  On top of that most surrogate mothers prefer to work through surrogacy agencies.

If intended parents are not able to afford the high gestational surrogacy cost in the USA, they can opt for international surrogacy countries like Ukraine, Georgia, and Colombia surrogate mother costs are affordable yet secure.

If you’d like to learn more about IVF, Egg Donation, or surrogacy services globally, check out the rest of our website:    IVF Conceptions. We offer legally secure and affordable surrogacy consulting services for FREE.